New York law seeks to support and encourage a meaningful relationship between a child and both parents, even if the parents aren’t living in the same home. Usually, that works well and visitation for many families goes without a hitch.
It is not that way for all families though. Sometimes a child will refuse to see their other parent. They will argue with the custodial parent about “being forced” to go to visitation. They may act out, exhibit depression symptoms, or behave in a destructive manner.
Children of just about any age can do this and there are several reasons for it.
If a child is refusing to see one of their parents, it should be a red flag for both parents. Sometimes it’s just a matter of kids being kids, but other times it could be caused by what the child is experiencing either at the non-custodial parent’s home or the custodial parent’s home. It should not be taken lightly.
The New York family court has protocols for handling these types of issues. Here’s what you need to know.
How Does Visitation in New York Work?
When two parents are deciding on custody in the courtroom, visitation, and child support are part of the conversation. Under New York law, the court is required to consider what is in the best interest of the child over anything else when ordering custody, visitation, and child support.
In a custody case, one parent is the custodial parent which means that that parent has physical custody of the child and that is where the child spends most of his or her time. The parent that the child does not live with is the non-custodial parent.
Because the non-custodial parent does not get to spend as much time with the child as the custodial parent, they are awarded visitation, often one or two days a week, every other weekend, and every other holiday.
The judge orders this type of visitation to help encourage a relationship with the child and the parent who does not live with them. The law recognizes the complexity of custody and divorce, and the judge tries to maintain those parental ties even though the child does not live with that parent.
The custody order is a court order. It is legally binding and if any of the terms are violated it could incur legal consequences.
Why Would the Court Deny a Parent Visitation In New York?
There are many reasons that a court would deny a parent visitation or restrict that visitation, requiring that it is supervised. However, it is usually not very easy to get a parent’s visitation rights denied or even restricted because the goal of the law is to allow the child access to the other parent so they can have a strong relationship with them.
Some of the more common reasons that a court would deny or restrict a parent’s visitation rights with their child include:
- The child is neglected while in the care of the parent.
- The child is abused mentally, physically, emotionally, or sexually while with the parent.
- The parent is abusing drugs or alcohol while they have the child for visitation – or are doing it in front of the child.
- The home environment is not suitable, safe, or healthy for the child.
- Anything else that would harm the child.
These things are usually not easy to prove. In order to get a modification for custody, there must be evidence to support the accusation.
Why Would a Child Refuse to See A Parent?
Children can come up with a number of reasons to not see a parent – many of which are not valid in the eyes of the law. As a parent, it is important to listen and determine if the claims warrant legal action. Sometimes kids just don’t want to go to visitation, and they have no good reason at all.
Common reasons a child might refuse to see a parent include:
- The child is being abused
- The child is being neglected
- The child does not feel safe
- The parent is doing drugs, getting high, or getting drunk in front of the child
These are some valid reasons that may warrant returning to court for a modification. Other reasons like the parent makes the child do chores or they don’t want to be away from their friends may not be as valid a reason.
At What Age Will a Judge Take A Child’s Preference Into Consideration When Determining Visitation?
A judge will consider the preference of the child at any age, but as the child gets older and more mature, their opinion and desire are more likely to have an impact on the decision. If a young child is being abused or the home environment is not safe, a small child may not be able to communicate that. The younger the child, the more difficult it is to get anything out of them that can be used in court. Often, a guardian ad litem will be assigned to a young child to give support and help facilitate the consideration of the child’s needs and preferences.
At What Age Can a Child Refuse To Visit A Parent in New York?
A child can legally refuse to visit a parent when the visitation order expires or is modified.
Basically, the child can refuse to visit a parent when the child is 18 years of. At that point, they are no longer children, but legal adults. New York law requires parents to support their child and provides them with visitation until the child’s 18th birthday.
Sometimes there is a court order denying visitation or the terms state that the child can skip visitation if they don’t feel like it. However, that is very rare.
What Can You Do If a Child Refuses Visitation With A Parent in New York?
If the reason that the child is refusing to go to their visitation is for a reason that does not affect their safety or health, they should attend. This may mean that the custodial parent has to step up and demand that the child go with the other parent.
If the reason that the child is refusing to go to their visitation is because they are being harmed or their safety is compromised, then it is time to talk to your family law attorney. It may require going back to court to modify the custody order.
Kids will be kids, true, but parents also have to listen.
If your child is refusing to go to visitation and their reasons are directly related to their safety, you need to act fast. Call the Litvak Law Firm at 718-989-2908 and talk to a member of our legal team. We’ll review your case and help you decide if it is time to go back to court or start complying with the court order for visitation.